But it hasn’t always been that way.
Mistakes didn’t feel like an opportunity, I didn’t embrace change, and I spent lots of energy trying to avoid being a failure. And then at some point, I honestly don’t recall when, I discovered a new perspective that has allowed me to recognize the growth potential in those uncomfortable situations when clearly I don’t know everything and school is in session.
Take the time I made my way into the interview room with Denzel, no last name needed.
It was 3 of us, very small, totally intimate. I had almost fainted earlier when he came walking down the hallway singing an old jazz tune and I greeted him to escort him to set. About halfway through the interview I realized I hadn’t turned my cell phone off and my purse was not within my reach. How could I make such a grave error?
I freaked, turned white, started to sweat and his publicist clearly saw the distress on my face. I plotted, strategized, wiggled and tried to use all my mental powers to keep my phone from ringing. I wanted to disappear and I made promises to all my ancestors, God, and anyone who could hear my thoughts that I would be a good person if I could just make it through the interview without my phone ringing.
And then the moment came that I had been praying for. The director called cut, I gasped for breath and Denzel got up to leave the room. His publicist came over to check my pulse and I told her I was feeling claustrophobic and queasy which satisfied her and they went on to their next event where I am certain I was a distance memory.
But guess what? I have NEVER been in an interview setting since that time without making sure my phone is turned off first.
And though it may not seem to some like a big life lesson it stuck with me because I chose to be compassionate with myself (even though turning off your cell phone is set etiquette 101), and I re-programmed myself to be mindful of those situations from that moment on. And I realized that mistakes are some of my greatest learning opportunities.
Not living in fear of making mistakes has expanded so many aspects of my world.
I accept myself more flaws and all.
I see mistakes as feedback and information about what works and what doesn’t.
I see that the past doesn’t predict the future and I leave room for possibility.
I let mistakes guide me into greater alignment with what I want and who I am.
I learn how to step into greater responsibility by taking ownership of my mistakes.
My mistakes have become little gifts and guideposts and are part of what makes me uniquely me.
I’m grateful for their lessons and plan on continuing to take strength and growth from what they have to offer because I‘m pretty certain there are more on their way!
See you on set.
Jessie